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Wolves and Weird Eyes

Morning of November 29, 1995. Wednesday.

This had been recorded as being an extremely vivid dream, as well as parts being lucid. I somehow end up where there are (living) wolves made of stone, of ice, of snow, and even of diamond. Mostly the wolves of snow seem to bite at me. In many dreams however, wolves are friendlier than domestic dogs. (In the past, mostly before around the age of fourteen, I often dreamed of dogs coming for me, while during the same periods, I sometimes had pet wolves. Presently, though, as I have recently stated, the “same” German shepherd had been in my dreams a few times as some sort of guardian for me - and it usually has some sort of pennant on its collar). I used to play with a wolf hybrid when very young in the coulees.

I had referenced a very pleasant and vivid sleep paralysis event that seemed to go on and on for some time, referring to “swinging” sensations from head to toe while in bed and pleasant energies that seemed to be rejuvenating my muscles and such. Sleep paralysis has mostly been extremely pleasant for me, though I have heard many people experience negative associations or unpleasant dreams (even nightmares) in such a state (more often than not). Odd. The interesting thing about sleep paralysis is that it is sometimes premonitory (somewhat similar to what I have read on epilepsy - though I do not have epilepsy), sometimes not - I have been in states where I was able to instigate the higher “buzzing” to more fully “separate” into the deeper states but other times it seemed “automatic”.

Sleep paralysis, throughout my life, always had the same features; a higher-pitched oscillation of perfect timing, almost like ring modulation (which sometimes remains in subtle continuity for a short time even after fully awake - more-so when I was younger), and waves of pleasurable sensations moving up and down my body, as well as the “jumping of will”, or that strange vibration or intense “spasm” above the navel. A few times, this had triggered a dream of lying on a beach on my back with my feet towards the ocean and feeling the ocean waves move over me in an even pattern for seemingly half an hour or longer.

At one point, I am “certain” that I am awake (though I am not) and get up, but when I go into the bathroom, I notice, upon looking in the mirror, that my eyes are very strange-looking. There are two sets of irises and pupils, side by side, in each eye. Seeing this, I become fully lucid and start doing pulsing affirmations within the dream (regarding universal love and health and well-being) until I actually do eventually wake - with that familiar “my body is made of mist” feeling that I get with certain affirmations with my special audio. There seems to be a point at which I can directly control the hypnopompic imagery, which is fairly rare (normally I can only “program” hypnagogia to whatever detail I choose - which often is enough to establish a particular dream scenario - but often prefer to leave nuances “open” to be pleasantly surprised if such is the case).

sleep paralysis brings beauty
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wolves of ice
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having weird eyes
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