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over 12 years ago
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insights-rambling on about me saying we because we are all one

been in sobriety and a state of personal examination and growth for 8 months now.
each day and night brings truths(knowing all is relative and i cling not to anything-searching for awareness in the middle)
today i awoke with this thought- yes i only know my life story and see the world around me through the filter of my experience but can't help but think that it may describe what a lot of us are going through...
what is this need this desire this urge this entitlement to party to celebrate to let go to be "free" through the use of drugs...?
i think i have discovered the void the hole within my self was created and developed in my childhood.
lack of loving stable family- parents and siblings were abusive and abused substances in attempts to numb their own wounds. the children around me all suffered from the same family dynamic- some wore it better than others some may have felt they were not victim to the structure of our society- yet now in adulthood have commercial jingles and values implanted within them that left them striving for the same empty lives that their parents had worn with pride.

it is the lack of family, the lack of community, the lack of trust that fills us with a bottomless emptiness...
a lot of us on this site have glimpsed beyond the veil we know there is more a great and loving everything that will never leave our side and we will always be a part of...yet the scars of our youth, the scars of our societal structure shape our every habit...

we look for the answer in gatherings, and clothing, musical tribes, drugs, the places we live even the people we pose in pictures with to display on our social networking sites.even when we think we have escaped the costume we are simply tricking our selves and prescribing to new medicine...

looking beyond those material answers

accepting
we are one

we are whole

there is no outfit, substance tribe or even structure that can permanently fill that void.

the creator is the answer and we are a divine part of a greater whole.
until we truly accept our divine connection

we will never be free
the dream of this life is a grand design a grand distraction set up to keep us on the hamster wheel.

praying daily for all of us to shine in the permanent sunshine of awareness
that we all awaken to our innate freedom
realize
activate
share
reflect

in love and light

(this was free form ramble writing) no judgement just thought- open as always to the mirror that is you.

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